Invasion on an unguarded fort

Each day the world has been moving at a pace accelerated by advancement in capacities and the unpleasant worry of an uncertain tomorrow. Unquestionably the pandemic has halted what was the old normal, shaking economies, livelihoods and hope. What it cannot weaken is the resilient ego which clouds the human psyche.

As a society, our understanding of life is reduced to money, survival and a confirmation bias about the same. The definitions of success, passion, growth, love and peace are over discharged and oversimplified. And so there seems a wave of people mindlessly chasing superficial happiness which ultimately cannot fill the void within.

Our culture as a society has been about living righteously, a noble, high minded, ethical and just lifestyle. This thinking is frequently reflected in our festivals. Last week we had Holi which brought this message of courage, no matter how small you are, if you stand against the wicked and unscrupulous however powerful, you win. Or we had Good Friday where the message of ultimate sacrifice for fellow beings can be learnt.

Such pious principles which were a source of human enlightenment are no longer pursued, only praised. What we see happening today is nowhere a reflection of what it was meant to be.

Tweaking values to our advantage, we are moving towards a future dominated by the language of consumerism where insecurities keep us away from the hard hitting real truth. And quite frankly, it is an invasion on an unguarded fort. Festivals are mindlessly celebrated, not valued. Wishes pour from all directions as a formality. Social media statuses about positively and ‘I am right’ are pills that distract us from questioning our actions. Flooded with choices and selfies, we welcome mediocrity which is marketed heavily, thus rejecting decency and critical thinking. Morality is thus refused as being impractical.

Realization comes at a point where things no longer stay the same, and truth is revealed, but can we afford to take it that further, because apparently, the answer is no.

We have to question, are we making a mistake here, in terms of breaking or building relationships, taking care of our environment, strengthening the mind that to in a direction of virtue? The idea of change has to be implemented at an individual, purely personal level. That is how things should be and that is when existence is be referred to as humane.

What has to be learnt is unlearning how things were taught.

A wise man once said nothing. I think he did what was right.


बात अनकही

बात अनकही ही रह जाए तो घबराएं नहीं

बेशक एहसास में जुबान तो होगी ही

हवा उस चिंगारी को बुझाती नहीं

जो सुलगती है पर एक रोज धुआं तो होगी ही

तकरार है बस ये कोई नफरत नहीं

ढूंढने निकला हूं कहीं ना कहीं वफा तो होगी ही

खामोशी में रात आज गुजरती नहीं

पर मुझे यकीन है कल फिर सुबह तो होगी ही

Guide to healthy relationships: Anger management

The foundation of a worthy life is healthy relationships with people that matter to you no matter how far you go.

And to be at peace we require peaceful interactions with our friends, family and society at large. It does not mean you cannot fight, have arguments or disagree. A healthy relationship requires the willingness to understand each other (which takes time and effort), knowing where both of you differ and intersect and consequently not trying to force change but initiate adaptability.
One of the most simple reasons why relationships fail is due to a LACK OF UNDERSTANDING. Just remember the last argument you had, was it because you were adamant about proving the other wrong with your wise arguments and presenting yourself to be the messiah whose opinions are only worthy of being right?
I certify maybe you were right, but by not building consensus and not letting someone else justify his/her stand, not acknowledging and empathizing with the other, you lose heavily. This small little thing is a crack forever, families fight, couples fight, people fight, countries fight because lack of understanding breeds lack of trust which becomes a pile of negative experiences to remember.

But briefly, we’ll break down anger with a nuanced and subjective approach. Leaving other things aside what exacerbates any situation is anger. During a fight, it usually happens that what you were trying to say was understood as something else, and consequently, everybody exploded with their armament, the battle is now about something that was not the issue initially.

  • ANGER IS A VOLCANO
    You just burst out when you can’t take anymore. It’s not just one thing it is a series of annoyances you have taken and you’re at the saturation point.
    TIP – Never keep misgivings for the future, settle things as and when they happen, nothing should be kept in stock.
  • ANGER IS A CHAIN REACTION
    You may be a calm person but if you encounter someone else’s aggression, you mirror it. You think an eye for an eye, tit for tat is a good defence strategy. But then why do you feel bad? It is because you know you did something which you shouldn’t have done.
    If you quarrelled at home, your mood has changed for the day. You stay frustrated for the entire day. There is a high probability that you will release it on someone else who too may pass it.
    TIP – If you see someone angry, don’t react, stay calm yourself and just BREAK THE CHAIN, give him/ her time to fully discharge the frustration and everything will be great. Don’t let ego overshadow empathy. Everyone has a bad day.
    And if you are frustrated don’t make someone else the victim of your wrath, and you know you’re not stupid enough to be angry at your boss, but certainly at your maid or the gatekeeper or someone in your family.
  • ANGER IS IRRATIONAL
    We don’t say the truth when we’re angry, we say what we know will break someone’s heart. We make illogical conclusions based on incomplete information.
    TIP – Realize that every individual has different viewpoints which are not in harmony with yours. Acknowledge the FACT that you are also never perfectly right. This will cultivate humbleness.
  • ANGER IS FOR YOU
    We are NOT angry at people, we’re are frustrated with our selves, maybe we keep unrealistic expectations from others or a pang of guilt that we aren’t following the lifestyle that we should be. This is the frustration that we are burdened with and anger is just an expression for HELP if you see it in that way.
    TIP – Life is beautiful, only if you smile and spread love whenever an opportunity comes. If you regret being angry at someone, apologize, simple.
    SORRY IS A MIRACLE, don’t let ego or awkwardness decide the course of action.
  • ANGER IS A SHOUT FOR A DIALOGUE
    Usually, a third person when seeing a fight unfold does his best to keep both the parties far and quietens them. This is a wrong approach. Never separate two people fighting, I mean never let them stop the dialogue.
    Two people separated by silence are worse than two people fighting to make the other understand their point.

FINAL TIP – A direct conversation will only resolve issues, no other thing can.
Every problem in today’s world is a mental health issue, whether these are uncommon crimes or destroyed empathy or depression and anxiety. Relationships help us overcome these difficulties only if we don’t make the relationship itself a difficulty. Always be kind especially to someone who deserves it. We need each other more than ever before. The alarm has been raised!

और क्या हाल है

घुला मिला सा शोर है

इधर उधर की बातें है

दबी छुपी सी ख्वाइशे है

खोया खोया सा मन

खफा खफा सी मंज़िल है

नपा तुला सा ज़ोर है

टेढ़ी मेढ़ी चाल है

बिखरे बिखरे से मोती

खिला खिला सा आईना है

रुखा सूखा पल है

सीधा साधा सा तौर है

और बेपरवाह सी मुस्कान

सच क्या है

यू मुँह मोड़ के दुनिया से कहा चला

तू खुद से ही खफा है, इलज़ाम लगा के कहा चला

सपनो ने सिर्फ सूरज दिखाया है

तू तो जागे बिना ही सवेरा करने चला

टकराना है तो ताकत भी चाहिए

तू तो बस उम्मीद लेकर जंग जीतने चला

झूठ मीठा बड़ा है, ये सच है

पर तू सच का स्वाद चखे बिना कहा चला

है बात कुछ और

है ख़ुशी और गम शामिल फिर भी

बेखबर जस्बात कुछ और है

है खैरियत का इंतेज़ाम काफी

लेकिन असली हालात कुछ और है

है मेहफ़ूज़ काबिलियत दुनिया समेटने की

पर अभी उसकी औकात कुछ और है

काफिला तो आगे बढ़ता जायेगा

मंज़िल मिल जाये तो बात कुछ और है

गर्दिश में कब तक रह पाओगे

सुकून से एक पल ठहरो ये एहसास कुछ और है

© tanishkbatham

I’m there

We’re not alone, there are the ones who love us unconditionally. Just go tell them that you do as well. Show gratitude, spread love, spread happiness! Be there for them!

To the friend,
Who was to me my buddy, my dear,
Who’s memories alive with me, in here,
For we are tangled in our lives,
Meeting is an occasion very rare,
But trust me buddy, I still care.


To the one,
Who came in my life,
Making a special place here,
Your eyes, your smile, your voice,
Sweetest and soothing to hear,
No, I’m not mad at your beauty mere,
But I love you, for your soul inside the body you wear.


To my God, my parents,
Who sacrifice their desires to see me reach my dreams somewhere,
I know what you go through and bear,
Behind the mask of laughter,
I can see the tear,
But you don’t need to worry,
Because I’m here,
With you always near,
I know my responsibilities and I’ll love you,
Forever I swear.


To the guardians of the country,
A huge thank you,
For we’re here, because you’re there,
Struggling against the enemy’s snare,
I salute you for the courage it takes,
To destroy the foe’s dare,
And it’s not your fight alone,
We’re there,
Backing you,                          
Because your victory is our wish, In every prayer.

Thank you for being there.

© tanishkbatham

THE DIFFERENCE 

​Foolish, isn’t the one who makes mistakes, 

But the one who repeats. 


Foolish, isn’t the one who fails, 
But the one who regrets. 


Foolish, isn’t the one who is sorry, 

But the one who never realizes. 


Foolish, isn’t the one who feels dejected, 

But the one who doesn’t move on. 


Foolish, isn’t the one who is fallen, 

But the one who doesn’t rise again. 


Foolish, isn’t the one who is mad, 

But the one, who isn’t. 

Tab Tak/ तब तक

” This is a battlefield and you are a warrior, you are alone, fighting against your fears and emotional complexes. Does’nt matter how many times you have been torn apart, brought down to pieces, destroyed or fallen to failures. But do not ever forget to get back up and say to your challenges that no matter what happened before, but now, even if a storm comes, I will be the one standing tall, and I will get past it, because I am the one who never ever gives up.”

Namaste and hello guys, this is my first post cum poem for all those who believe in themselves. I hope you all will like it, please comment your views.

जि़दगी हर मोड़ पर है एक ज़ग, 

चाहे सामने हो दुनिया या फिर खुद ही खड़े हो हम, 

 

सौ बार गिर गए, हजा़रो बार गिरा दिये गए, 

तो हुआ क्या? 

अभी हारे तो नहीं है हम, 

 

मन में साहस, आँखो मै विश्वास,

बाजु़ओ मे ताकत भरकर,

ऐ जिंदगी, ये देख! 

ये देख, फिर खड़े हो गए है हम, 

हो रहा होगा आश्चर्य तुझे, 

कि अभी तक कैसे है मैदान में हम? 

शुक्रिया गिराने के लिए,

अपनी ताकत का अहसास दिलाने के लिए, 

 

अब जब तक ना जीत जाते, 

तब तक रोकेंगे नहीं ये कदम, 

डर के साथ ये जंग तब तक ना होगी खत्म, 

जब तक ना हो जाए ये डर ही खत्म, 

लड़ते रहेंगे हम तब तक, 

जब तक इस पर फतह ना कर जाए, 

 

जिस दिन जीतेंगे, उस दिन ये दुनिया भी हमारी होगी, 

और हमारे ही होंगे हम, 

वो दिन कोई और नहीं है, वो पल कोई और नहीं है, 

वो आज है, वो अभी है, 

जीत इसी लम्हें में है, 

जब तक ये विश्वास रहेगा, 

तब तक जीत ते रहेंगे हम॥ 

©tanishkbatham.wordpress.com